Curing Perfectionism (Part Two)
This is Part II of a two-part blog I wrote on perfectionism. Click here to catch up on Part I if you missed it from last week.
We all have a little voice in our head that plants seeds of self-doubt. Everyone is familiar with that constant battle between our desires and the inner critic who tries to create chaos by stirring up negativity with decision-making. As artists, that voice can be its loudest when we’re struggling with work in the studio and the fear created in that environment leads to a side effect known as perfectionism.
On its face, art and perfectionism seem like an odd couple. Mistakes can be rebranded as innovation or simply painted over. If engineers and surgeons are on one end of the perfect spectrum, artists would certainly fall on the other. A real bridge can’t be abstract, but one in a painting can be.
And yet, artists are just as susceptible to the demands of perfectionism as anyone else. The cliched image of the quirky painter covered head-to-toe in paint in a messy studio obscures the reality that creating is often a lonely pursuit where the only sounding board is in your head. Trying to quiet that voice alone lends itself to perfectionism, which can stifle any well-intentioned idea.
Here are tips to stave off perfectionism in your practice:
4. Doing Hard Things
Don’t let the title of this section fool you— this isn’t about white-knuckling and waking up at 4am everyday to prove a point. To build off the previous tip in Part I, if you’re committing to a project or a pursuit where it’s only you holding yourself accountable, it’s going to be hard. I believe it’s important for perfectionists to find comfort in the idea that even sketching for 20 minutes a day, or something like that, can feel overwhelmingly difficult when you’re used to working for a guaranteed payoff.
Give yourself credit when you complete a small art task that you set out for yourself. Time is so precious for all of us and in order to build a sustainable art practice from scratch, setting aside a moment to congratulate yourself for overcoming even the smallest seeming barrier is productive.
5. Make A Mistake Mantra
Even if you’ve gotten the ball rolling on a forgiving art practice without perfectionism rearing its head, that doesn’t mean that mistakes won’t bog you down from time to time. No one likes mistakes after all. But reframing your mistakes can really help.
In order for a mistake to not open the door for that mean-spirited voice in your head, make a mistake mantra. Here are some of the ones I use to overcome self-doubt:
- Mistakes are chapters in my journey
- How I respond to mistakes defines me, not the mistakes themselves
- Cringy paintings show that I’m making progress as an artist
- Spelling mistakes, even the most obvious ones, show how far I’ve come
(Note: I have dyslexia, so this one really pops up in my writing; trust me, when I mistakenly use the the wrong “there/their/they’re” now I like to remind myself how much more I used to do that lol)
Identifying your mistakes and creating new language around them is really helpful. Even if your inner voice doesn’t buy this mind trick, that’s ok, sometimes it will seem really fake and phony and other times it will resonate with a brighter outlook.
6. Age is Childhood Plus Time
One of the most serendipitous things that has occurred in my life was starting my painting journey when I was a new mom with a two-month old. I don’t have a relationship with my parents and there are not many maternal figures in my day-to-day life, so one of my coping techniques when I was so isolated with a newborn was devouring parenting books.
One of the books that really changed my life is No Bad Kids by Janet Lansbury. If you’re unfamiliar, it’s basically a judgement-free parenting philosophy. Although I was reading it for tips on motherhood, I realized I could also use the tenets of the book to transform my creative practice.
I know this sounds weird, but the book taught me that if you’re going to open yourself up to the vulnerabilities and insecurities of making art without allowing judgment to get in the way, you’ve got to treat yourself as if you’re a child. The idea is that you’re creating love and understanding for yourself in balance with structure and expectations. You are pairing an abundant self-forgiveness and self love with the hard work it takes to continue to show up in your practice. It’s only through the balance of the two that you can find the discipline and structure to create and the love and forgiveness to keep going in the face of slip-ups.